My take on Matisyahu's act

I have to interrupt my foodie posts with something that i feel i have to write.

Today, right after lunch (pasta with basil-fried onion tomato sauce), i was checking my Facebook on my phone, waiting for the kids to finish eating to clean up the dining room...and i came across this post:

This morning I posted a photo of myself on Twitter.

No more Chassidic reggae superstar.

Sorry folks, all you get is me...no alias. When I started becoming religious 10 years ago it was a very natural and organic process. It was my choice. My journey to discover my roots and explore Jewish spirituality--not through books but through real life. At a certain point I felt the need to submit to a higher level of religiosity...to move away from my intuition and to accept an ultimate truth. I felt that in order to become a good person I needed rules--lots of them--or else I would somehow fall apart. I am reclaiming myself. Trusting my goodness and my divine mission.

Get ready for an amazing year filled with music of rebirth. And for those concerned with my naked face, don't worry...you haven't seen the last of my facial hair. - Matisyahu

I understood that something was going on, so i did some research, and i found a couple of picture of a new Matisyahu...no beard and no peot.
Beside that, the pictures made me somewhat sad, because he doesn't look happy, or healthy.
The reaction of the "virtual community" was huge, from disappointed Jews to happy Xtians that think that he is converting to their faith...
 My reaction was: of course you are free to make you decisions, but it's sad that you couldn't find your way in the world of chassidut, after all these years and your nice songs.
Speaking with Alec later on, he made me understand that this is nothing new, that it happens all the time, and he pointed put that in a way it's also Chabad fault if he decided to abandon chassidut.
I know that many Chabad people are gonna jump on me right now at least virtually, but it's so true. There are many issues in Chabad, and a lot of pressure on things that are not the ikkar, the main point of being observant. And there is some lack of intellectual honesty at times, and baalei teshuva tend to get on fire and then get turned off when the initial paradise phase fades away...
I must say that i went through disillusion myself, but i chose to build my own way of being chassidishe, without going away from chassidut altogether...special thanks to Alec that keep my feet on the ground <3

Anyway, in the afternoon comes another statement from him:


For all of those who are being awesome, you are awesome. For all those who are confused: today I went to the Mikva and Shul just like yesterday


So i got even more confused.
I had understood from his first statement that was his intention to move away from those rules that he had imposed on himself: aren't davening and mikva two of those?
What does he mean then?
My disappointment i must admit is egoistic, because i liked his music and i thought that it was possible to be chassidish and produce good original music (no offense to anybody else)...well seems like the equilibrium broke, and here i am without any religious music to listen to except for Karduner...
I can't listen to him now, after all of this happen: too much incoherence.
My love goes to Tahli, i send you a big hug and i want you to know that i still have the photo that you took of me and Miriam chatting with some israeli girls inside Gam Gam restaurant, right after Shabbat...